10 eSSENTIAL TIPS FOR MANAGING YOUR ANXIETY

There are different types of anxiety episodes and disorders. Some are developmental and originate from your childhood following traumatic incidents. Other forms of anxiety like panic attacks, social anxiety or phobia can show up in your life as you go through major changes such as a divorce, the sudden death of a loved one or a redundancy. Anxiety can also appear in conjunction with other mental health issues or substance/medication withdrawal.

Overall, anxiety whether punctual or recurrent is a difficult and terrifying experience that compromises your sense of safety and that stops you from living an enjoyable life. Anxiety triggers your nervous system and prompts your body to prepare for an imminent danger. This physiological process is both intense and exhausting whilst your emotions can be overwhelming, difficult to access and process.

Fortunately, anxiety can be treated with adequate therapeutic interventions and treatment. At the core of this process is the capacity to develop a different relationship to your anxiety and its symptoms as well as an understand and process underlying emotions.

 Therapy sessions are an important part of this process, and I invite you to consult your GP if you think you suffer from anxiety. You can also contact me for therapy sessions. However, if you are not able to have therapy just now, I have put together 10 essentials tips that will hopefully help you manage your anxiety:

Tip 1: Ask yourself if the threat is real or imaginative

Fear is an emotional response to a real threat. For instance, if there is a lion running towards me, I have every reason to be fearful. By contrast, anxiety is the anticipation of a future threat that is not always real. For example, I might be anxious to get into a lift for fear of being stuck and possibly die. Even if stuck in a lift, it is very unlikely that I will die. Anxiety is the erroneous perception of such threat.

When you experience anxiety, ask yourself if the threat is real or imaginative. Evaluate the situation, look around you and check if you are safe. Whilst it is natural to experience a stress response when exposed to a real threat, it is maladaptive to experience fear in its absence. Therapy helps regulate this maladaptive experience by retraining the brain and re assessing thoughts and emotions.

Tip 2: If you are too overwhelmed to reassess the situation, ask someone to do it for you

(If you are too anxious and feel suicidal, call the Samaritans line on 116 123 (UK)

When you are in the middle of an anxiety attack, it can be quite challenging to think rationally or to tell yourself that the threat is not real. You will know you have an anxiety attack because of the way you will feel. You are likely to have shortness of breath, heart palpitations, uncontrollable thoughts, feelings of panic, shaking, nausea, sweating, and/ or crying.

It can be helpful to reach out to someone and explain that you are going through an anxiety attack. Speak to a member of staff if you are in a public place or a colleague if you are at work or call a friend to share your distress. It might be a good idea to have an anxiety buddy that will reassure you with a specific phrase like ‘nothing is going to happen to you, you are going through an anxiety attack’.

Tip 3: Know that no one dies from an anxiety attack

An anxiety attack usually lasts around 20 minutes. It might be reassuring to know that there is a beginning and an end to it. Try to endure the anxious episode knowing that you will eventually come out of it. If you are not going through an attack but feel like you are permanently in a state of hypervigilance, try to accept this situation instead of resisting it. Create a motto ‘Anxiety is part of my life, but it does not define me, I keep going’.

Tip 4: Practice deep breathing to regulate your nervous system

Anxiety creates a state of alertness and hypervigilance. It tells your body to prepare for an imminent danger or it suggests that something awful is going to happen to your loved ones for example. In those situations, learn to deep breath by breathing in for 6 seconds and out for 4 seconds. Repeat as many times until you feel better.

Tip 5: Connect to the reality around you by engaging your 5 senses

Name something you see, smell, touch, hear and move and re-evaluate the situation. The point of this exercise is to get you back to reality by engaging a different part of your brain. The more you will solicit this part and the more you will realize that you are safe.

Tip 6: Build a positive relationship with your anxiety

Make a list of all the positives things that you do because of anxiety like organizing yourself, staying  alert, anticipating.

Tip 7: Get to know your anxiety: Identify your triggers and avoidance behaviours

The objects, situations or thoughts that will trigger you into an anxiety attack and the behaviours that you set up to avoid being triggered. For instance, a person who is anxious about taking the tube might walk to work every morning. The trigger to the anxiety attack is being in the tube and the avoidance behaviour is walking.

Tip 8: Write a journal to explore your emotions

Once you have identified your triggers and avoidance behaviours, you can start exploring your emotions. This will help you separate from your anxiety and get some control over it. You can also notice the moments without anxiety and journal about the emotions you feel when it is the case.

Tip 9: Practice mindfulness

Practicing mindfulness can help you create some space in your mind and heart. In this space, you will learn to find rest, peace and safety. Overall, you will improve your capacity to be in your own company and to tolerate strong emotions. Take a few minutes each day to be mindful (register to a free program, I highly recommend the free 40 days training Tara Brach course).

Tip 10: Connect with people who have a similar experience

You will realise that you are not alone. Join groups or anxiety forums.